Another Useless Emotion?????????

 For the last few weeks I have been feeling very cranky. The slightest little thing drives me into a rage... the positive side is that have been able to control my anger and have not exploded on anyone, yet... You see they (the clever people) tell me that this is a stage or a phase that is normal during grieving. That somehow this "abnormal" is normal... I hate it! 

Death has taken so much from me... now it's imposing feelings upon me that I do not want in my life. In fact, feelings that I do not need in my life. What use could I possible have for anger in my life right now? It feels like such a useless emotion... The worse is that I do not even know what exactly I am angry at. It just feels like I am angry at life... Angry at the decisions I made in life... the decisions I did not make... people... situations... aaagh! Everything annoys me! What's the use? I really hate this feeling! Yes... I did say hate... it is how I feel... and now I am angry that I am angry...what's wrong with me... This is so frustrating!            

So if I seem irritable and I seem to be picking a fight with you... bear with me and give me a hug... 
Over that last few week the thing that keeps ringing in my ears is, "...BUT the greatest of these is love."(1 Corinthians 13:13) Love truly overcomes all... even the wrath of a grieving father.